How to Make French Toast
Making French toast is extremely easy especially if you’re French. If you’re not French but just a cultural-appropriating monster who would like to take advanta ...
A Ghost Helped Me out in Waco, Texas
I got lost with my girlfriend one night in Waco, Texas. Roads were deserted. No people. No cars. Then a ghost helped me find my way. This was around 2003 or ...
That Time I Almost Met Nelly Furtado
If you've spent any time around me then you're well aware that in the early 2000's I hung out with Stone Temple Pilots in their private rehearsal studio. I've p ...
How to Make Semi-Homemade Pizza
This only barely qualifies as a recipe since it's so open-ended. Basically, you need two things: A frozen cheese pizza. Whatever the hell you want to pu ...
If the Dukes of Hazzard had a Smartphone with Google Maps
I was driving today with Google Maps on when my phone dinged and said there was a speed trap ahead. I bet The Dukes of Hazzard would have been pretty boring if ...
Super Simple Campfire Chicken Hash
Here's a simple recipe we threw together while camping this past weekend called "Super Simple Campfire Chicken Hash" because that's the type of top-notch culina ...
I Made Chicken Wings in the Ninja Foodi
Advances in modern science and technology have brought us many wondrous devices in the past several years such as the Perseverance Mars rover and the Ninja Food ...
How to Make Slightly Less Lethal Ramen
Like you, my favorite food in the entire world is ramen (from the ancient Japanese word "ramen" meaning "more sodium per teaspoon than an entire livestock salt ...
When COVID’s Gone, Then What?
Despite the mass suffering COVID-19 has inflicted upon the United States, one good thing it has done is proven that, like America's Greatest Generation before u ...
My Thoughts on the First 2020 Presidential Debate
The first of allegedly three debates between President Trump and former Vice President Joe Biden went down last night with all the class, grace and decorum of a ...
Clear the Tracks! The Story You’re Reading Right This Very Moment Could Save Your Life Unless You Get Hit by a Train
This was originally published in an issue of the Austin-American Statesman newspaper’s XL Ent entertainment magazine on April 22, 1999! ##### In ...
I Deactivated My Twitter Account and Here’s What Happened (How’s That for a Shitty Clickbait Title?!)
Twitter is a hellscape of people hell bent on making the worst parts of humanity - which are fewer than Twitter users would have you think - the only parts that ...
I’m a Male Model!
It's the last thing I ever expected to be, and probably won't be again anytime soon, but here's what happened... My buddy and screenplay writing partner Patr ...
I Bought a Vintage Commodore Vic-20 Computer
Well, I guess I've been officially bitten by the "I'm going to collect vintage computers for no reason" bug after buying a Tandy TRS-80 Model 100 a couple of we ...
Movie Review: BumbleBee (2018)
I've never been much into the Transformers movies, but this one caught my eye because it looked quite a bit different than what I'd come to expect from the fran ...
