RANDOM STUFF
NEW STUFF
I Regret to Inform You that Mr. Rogers has Denied Your Request to be His Neighbor
Dear Timmy, I hope this letter finds you well via speedy delivery, however, I fear that after your mother reads this to you, you will probably be very sad. On ...
LASIK: A Visionary Vision for the Future of Your Vision
If you’ve been thinking about getting LASIK eye surgery to correct your vision but are nervous about the procedure, don’t worry. There is really nothing to fear ...
Queasy Rider: How to Survive Riding a Motorcycle by Going Very, Very Slow
For some unknown reason, despite thoroughly cleaning out my ears daily, every morning my right ear appears to have been used as Madame Tussaud’s scrap bucket ov ...
Retail Chain Launches Fleet of Robot Customers to Automate Bullshit Demands on Staff
Big box retail chain Glutmart announced today via company-wide memo that they will be automating bullshit demands on staff with the help of a fleet of high-tech ...
I’ve Just Been Added as a MuddyUm Humor Writer. The Fools!
Despite not being funny at all, I have just been added to MuddyUm’s roster of humor writers. The fools! They fell for my ruse! As evidence of my complete lack ...
7 Sound Financial Tips Anyone Can Probably Read
According to several major news outlets, the economy is in a truly terrible state. Of course, no matter what the state of the economy is, major news outlets alw ...
Thrimbal Scrumpwiffle and the Toad Squash Gourds
In a tree by a brook is where Thrimbal Scrumpwiffle the Forest Imp lived. He lived peacefully, unmolested by beasts or kingsmen. He lived happy days, catching t ...
Tim Hawthorne: State Finals Ping-Pong Champion
To say their description of me under my photo in the newspaper back then was unflattering is to put it mildly: His face was cursed by an ever-rupturing lan ...
BOOK COMING SOON!
Junk Drawer by Clif Haley is a book of words formatted in such a way that if you look at them from left to right they impart humor directly into your brain! If you’d like to be notified when it becomes available just sign up here:
